Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Why do many women wear sleeveless shirts, more so than men?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand how hurricane paths work

Why do some people dislike Gilmore girls?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have complete contempt for fakery

My ex moved on so fast. How can I overcome the pain?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Have you made a female relative or friend squirt?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t cotton to rapists

What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Why do people hate on Serena (anime character)? What did she ever do to anyone except be a good friend to Ash Ketchum and an awesome trainer herself?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Is there a band whose members have been present for every one of their concerts?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I actually pay taxes

Am I the unique Gen Z if I dislike TikTok and prefer the 2000s technology trends like retro consoles, CRTs, and CD/DVDs?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for traitorism

How do you explain BYD selling more battery electric vehicles than Tesla in Europe for the first time in April?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

How do I stop having work crushes because I only keep getting disappointed almost every day as I keep seeing they don’t like me back and won’t ever ask me out?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

What can I do after 18 cops raided my home, without a warrant, seeking a person who didn't live there and wasn't there, and also went through all of my stuff? The person wasn't on the lease, and they didn't see him enter.

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I can read

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Mya Lesnar, Daughter of WWE Star Brock, Wins 2025 NCAA Shot Put Championship - Bleacher Report

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

What is the meaning of xx in texting?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy bullshit

Family scapegoats with years of healing: what events or thoughts precipitated your full acceptance of your family's narcissistic dynamic? Can you share your inner thoughts as you reached it? How do we know when we have reached full acceptance?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I can count

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I see through liars

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t watch or listen to advertising